First post = the hardest? Blank canvas? Fuck, I hated blank canvasas (canvi?) when I used to paint. Especially if I stretched/applied gesso/sanded it down myself. Just couldn’t find the will to violate the surface. And when I did finally build enough courage, I would treat her/it with way too much veneration, applying one well rehearsed, transparent mark after another. Had a much easier time with large gessoed pieces of drawing paper laid on the ground. But, that was then and this is now. But still, the problem persists. So, how does one approach a blank page? By jumping in, I guess. And where better to start, than at the beginning – right? And why not start with a whimper instead of a bang, that way there aren’t too many expectations (or any for that matter). So here it goes nothing; literally;
The first time I ever stepped foot into a NYC public library was with my best friend Jason Marino, when we were 7 years old. I didn’t quite link the relationship between the monstrous collection of books before me and the quaint little library back at our grade school. All I knew was that I wanted to read/touch/feel every single book I could get my hands on in this place. So astonished was I by the endless rows of shelves stacked with what seemed to me to be an infinite amount of books, that after taking a good look around and noticing a couple of open windows on the third floor by the children’s section, I motioned to Jason to come close and I whispered, "ok, you go outside and stand over there by that tree, and I'll throw the books we want out the windows so that we can take them home to read." To which he replied, "ok. But you do know that this is a library. We can 'check' out the books with a library card. See”, he showed me the library card his father had recently helped him acquire, “it's free." Blew my fucking little mind.